Let’s face it. Divorce is difficult even under the most civil of circumstances. Many people want to have an amicable divorce (and we certainly proponents of that), but getting your fair share may take more than just being nice and getting legal advice. After all, how can you know if you are making wise choices if you aren’t able to think rationally and don’t have all the financial facts to base decisions upon?

So how do you protect yourself in the midst of the chaos?
Here are just a few things to consider (among many more) …
Start gathering all your documents as soon as possible – Once divorce becomes imminent papers sometimes have a way of disappearing or you may find yourself locked out of online accounts.

Get your team in place ASAP – Your core team members should include your attorney, divorce financial planner and therapist, but you may also need other specialists like a mediator, realtor, mortgage specialist, insurance expert and more.

Don’t stick your head in the sand – Start early and allow your team enough time to do their best work for you without undue pressure from deadlines that you may not want to deal with.

Don’t use your children as pawns – This will only serve to further tear apart the fabric of what’s left of your family and may set your children up for many years of mental anguish.

Treat your divorce like a business transaction – After all this is the business of your life and you are the one who will live with the choices and consequences of those choices after your divorce.

Be a Proactive Partner, NOT a Passive Participant
– Be sure you understand the choices that are being put in front of you and don’t sign on the dotted line if you are not absolutely crystal clear on what you are agreeing to. For the most part, there are no do-overs in divorce (there may be some areas regarding support issues that can be modified, but division of assets / debts is generally final).

Where do you go from here? 
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